


the boys get saucy

by RejextedSauce



Series: ghoulfriend adventures [1]
Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Closeted, Cockblocking, Friendly Ghosts, Ghost Hunters, Kinda, M/M, Plot Twists, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Saucy, Wax Play, based off a snapchat convo with a friend, basically a joke, ghost peen mentioned, if you get what I'm putting down, mention of dead kids because school, pickle polishing, the mine episode, they find a ghost, what is my life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2019-01-18 07:30:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12383673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RejextedSauce/pseuds/RejextedSauce
Summary: it's saucy ghost time(and yes this is a joke)





	the boys get saucy

**Author's Note:**

> my friend wrote a series of snapchats with a+ material so this story is based off his snaps about shane and ryan being saucy ghoulfriends

Ryan was growing more and more uneasy as the night moved on. His companion, Shane, didn't seem to notice. He only laughed as Ryan would double and triple check his surroundings, urging Shane to enter doorways and cut corners before him. 

By the time they had reached the school building, Ryan had begun to fidget his spinner anxiously. 

“Ryan, Jesus says chill.” 

Ryan glared at him. “I can feel the hair on my neck standing up. It’s fucking  _ weird  _ here and I want out.”

Shane laughed at his response and smirked. “That’s not the only thing standing up.”

Ryan raised an inquisitive eyebrow as Shane grabbed his wrist and pulled Ryan after him further into the building. After passing through the doorway Ryan became more and more uncomfortable. “The children are watching!” he hissed. 

Shane pulled Ryan into the closet with him. “Good,” he replied. “We should let them know…” He licked his lips and looked down at Ryan hungrily. He reached his hand up to caress Ryan’s hair as he whispered seductively into his ear, “the boys are here.” Ryan wheezed as Shane slowly slipped his hand around Ryan’s waist. 

Ryan moved his lips closer to Shane, inching towards his ear as he replied to Shane’s sexy words. “It’s ya boy,” Ryan replied thusly. He proceeded to lightly press his chest against Shane’s. 

Shane pushed back against the pressure, pinning him against the wall. He licked Ryan’s ear as he whispered, “I want you to wax my carrot, burry the cob, polish my pickle Ryan Bergara.”

Ryan took his words into careful consideration and proceeded forcefully. He looked up into Shane’s lustful eyes and replied. “It’s spooky time.”

Shane almost came from the sexy words spoken by his ghoulfriend. Shane pulled Ryan onto his lap as he lowered himself onto the empty mattress frame they found in the closet. Ryan paused for a second. “I don’t think the ghost children will appreciate us fucking-”

Shane pressed his finger against Ryan’s mouth. “Just go with the flow, Ryan. We’re giving them free entertainment,” the taller man smirked. He then proceeded to wrap his arms around Ryan’s waist, kissing his neck and spoke between gentle kisses, “you’re my one and only boy, Ryan.”

Ryan moaned upon hearing these words. The two of them melted against each other as they started to undress. Shane pulled off both their shirts as their mouths started to devour each other. 

Shane felt Ryan’s hardon poke him, so he grinned and snuck his hand under the band. He started to stroke the shorter man. “You like that, Bergara?” he whispered into his lover’s ear.

“Like what?” Ryan asked.

Shane froze. He looked down and started to peer into Ryan’s boxers when it hit him. 

There was a  _ ghost _ in Ryan’s pants. He touched a  _ ghost peen _ .

A shrill scream pierced the air as Ryan threw his pants off and ran around the room as Shane stared dumbfounded at the ghost peen inches away from his hand. 

“What the  _ fuck _ ?” Shane exclaimed. This isn’t how he thought he’d discover ghosts, with a boner in his own pants and his hand accidentally jacking the ghost off seconds before he realized it. 

Ryan wheezed, “get the camera!” Shane fumbled to get the camera as the realization hit him.

“Ryan, how do we explain you being butt naked and this ghost’s dick whipped out?” Ryan deadpanned, his eyes glazed over. 

“Fuck it, the world doesn’t need to know about ghosts. Let’s get the  _ fuck out _ ,” Ryan replied. 

Shane nodded as they dashed out leaving the ghost and his hardon alone. The boys sprinted for the car not caring to get anymore footage. The boys were here and they did enough. Sex was ruined forever. 

**Author's Note:**

> have we sinned? debateable. am i ashamed? kinda yeah actually.


End file.
